do no harm:


idit dobb-weinstein: "teaching is action and thinking at once. What I try to guard against most when I teach is not speaking as if my answer were conclusive, so as to avoid (to the extent possible) any kind of dogmatic appropriation. It is understandable why students might wish to imitate their teachers, but there are different modes of imitation. I try very hard to avoid the mimetic appropriation that is immediate, passive, and occludes thinking. One other reason is that if I made clear what my views were, and my views appeared as if they were final, it would preclude the possibility of first, students challenging me and second, learning from my students. The relation between the student and teacher is, to me, a dynamic relationship . . . Teaching and learning is a movement that occurs between. In other words, we are at once both agent and patient, both teacher and learner. If we are not very careful, we can do a great deal of harm. And that, too, I have learned from my teachers, Maimonides especially.

I believe my task is to provoke students to think and to engage them in genuine dialogue and questioning. To paraphrase a rabbinic saying, 'I have learned from my teachers, and I have learned from my peers, but I have learned most from my students.' And that is a continuous process of learning."

Saturday 1 May 2010

sheriff's passing along incident report re: joseph tolle screaming at me under the ASO election tent when i told him not to touch me.
i can go back and make formal charges for battery and explain situation to deputy if i want.

they will forward the incident report to bradford.

the student who was hit over the head with the paper in anthro could also indeed file a report for battery.

the officers seemed alarmed about the verbal aggressiveness of the students and professors.
they agreed that they would not want their daughters screamed at in such manner.

i will go back during the week when more staff are present to discuss the options with the deputy.

Friday 30 April 2010

letter to lawrence bradford, vice president of student services at LACC

thank you for your advice about the LSAT and the holistic approach!!!!

it was the best guidance counseling session ever!!!!

I regret to inform you that earic peters will be forwarding two incident reports to you regarding
ASO VP for finance screaming at me under the ASO election tent when i asked him not to keep touching my shoulder.
he also lied vigorously in his defense.

i cannot be around such cruel and violent people.

i am also appalled by the proceedings against sheila and fear that any racist sexist student government action could imperil LACC if administrators to not halt what appears to me to be a campaign of petty hatred and discrimination by a predominantly male group against a non-white woman.

i think this would never happen to a man or a white woman and i fear that LACC risks a PR nightmare for allowing this character defamation to continue.

witnessing the harassment of sheila is detrimental to my ability to feel safe at LACC.

i am meeting with jamillah and earic on may 14th at one o'clock to discuss my ideas for a proactive Equality Coalition united against sexism, racism, homophobia, disability discrimination, islamophobia, and professor harassment.

i have heard the most offensive things in class from professors and feel personally such anxiety and sadness that it affects my grades and ability to focus on my studies.

i would love to meet with you and explain further.

truly, i am focused on my long term goals.
however, my humanitarian nature revolts at the thought that such flagrant violation and verbal abuse will continue at LACC.

i do not want any human being to suffer what i have suffered.
if i had known how disrespectful the atmosphere here would be, i would have never commenced studies here.

the traumatizing effects of verbal abuse can last a lifetime, and are in direct defiance of the educational code guaranty of equality in education and a harassment free school place.

thank you for your investigations.
mary eng
listening to moot court competition of vanderbilt and lewis and clark.

reading animal law review of lewis and clark.

reported joseph tolle's condescending touching of my shoulder and his screaming outburst under the ASO election tent wednesday night.

he happened to walk in the moment i was handing my report to earic peters.
he quickly lied, "she screamed at me first."

similar to his lie, "you touched me first, why the double standard."

isn't it strange that people lie?
i am not a good liar.
i would be more successful if i were.
it bothers me.
i most surely can't do it quickly without batting an eye.
kudos to joseph tolle, vice president of finance for the LACC ASO, for having no intuition about when touching is unwanted, and for losing his temper under the election booth, a true irony, and unprofessional .
and for lying faster than i could think of a lie, a sign of intelligence and a successful future in business, and for lying in front of earic peters in the student resource center, yesterday in accusing me of screaming.

i commend someone who is so perfectly willing to lie in public, in front of many people, shout and raise his voice with no shame in front of other students, and continually touch a woman's shoulder hand and arm, uninvited, and with condescension.


i do not feel safe around someone like this.
beware.

this is my recommended reading for him
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anger_management

Thursday 29 April 2010

remembering my first ASO meeting when someone said something harassing to sheila about five weeks ago.
i immediately spoke up and said "don't sexually harass people from the legal department.  you are barking up the wrong tree. "

i remember that michael laughed.
it was rather funny, wasn't it?
i want to ask them if they remember it.

idea: why going to LACC is similar to time travel.

retrogressive, back in to the fifties, etc. sexist, absurd, anti-technology . . .

edu-tainment: entertaining levels of incompetence in education.

and wondering if the ASO would conduct their little hate campagn against a white man or a white woman?

would they do to me what they are doing to sheila?
i doubt it.

why is the ASO so hateful and divisive and negative?

major bad vibes.

more students should come and observe.
but like me, they probably implicitly distrust the process.
they might find it edutaining especially if they are into cruelty to women, or women of color.
so bizarre!!!!
more later

letter to law prof tom duffy


thank you for your concern

part of why i looked so ill last week was also the detrimental effect of more harassment from a young professor who shouted offensive things at me

i told him he was making me uncomfortable and yet he persisted and sent me a cruel letter telling me i have no case to ask for women to be treated equally and fairly in the classroom.

vargas knows about this and refers it to cristy passman.
she pushes everything under the rug when it comes to professors saying offensive things.

i really think we need professors with more commitment to equality.

i think you are the best teacher the law department has, but nonetheless could watch out lest your words not jive with the modern era.

for instance "cheesecake" could be interpreted as a sexist way of referring to women as objects.

i recall hearing this in your class.

don't you think in light of the lopez lawsuit, LACC could be a little more careful not to tread on this dangerously litigable ground . . .

you should have heard what lanzer has said in class.
that vargas brought in a ridiculous movie to criminal law clas complete with every imaginable racist epithet and sexist word you could think of astounded me a year ago . . .
i wrote him a letter about it.

a lot of kids i talk to hear an abundance of things across departments that sound fairly litigable

as you oppose frivolous suits, so too wouldn't you hope that LACC do some preventative work to make sure it follows this
edu code?

well---thanks for your care and concern.
in addition to the dentistry issues, i sobbed for days bc i am so ashamed to be held captive at a school where so many teachers disrespect students with verbal abuse.

the fact that a teacher would boldly say "show your tits" twice in class and then when called into question shout "tits and ass" to prove his "academic freedom" is absurdly sickening to me.

obviously, i want i higher academic level as well.

the teacher wrote to me the next day
"Finally, before you make a mountain out of a mole-hill, perhaps you need to revisit the entomology of the word "tit."  It derives from teat, meaning nipple, and can be pronounced as tit or teet.  Both men and women have them, as do the cows on the farm on which I grew up."

and
"With all due respect, you are completely out of line.  In no way can my class be described as "vulgar and antiquated."  I take offense at this gross misrepresentation.  Before you levy such a charge against me, I strongly suggest you think hard about what you are saying.  You will see that you have no case."

can you imagine an adult teacher writing this in an email to another adult???

i think this email was almost worse than the class outburst bc it was so personal and such an attempt to silence me.

by "antiquated" i mean an authoritarian tone which denigrates women and then attempts to silence them by shouting and other forms of rudeness

and funnily also
"these base-less accusations have left me with no choice but to forbid all filming and taping of my lectures, as my academic freedom is now at stake. "

freedom to say stupid things on tape, i guess?

i know you can't respond bc everybody has to protect their salary etc but i thought i'd keep you in the loop.

too bad for the students and the fact that student bloggers will publish this on the internet seems all the more reason for professors to exercise due care 

thanks for all the classes and if you have any ideas for ways we can stop the verbal abuse and the detrimental psychological effects, please let me know.

i was beset with so much anxiety spring 2009 bc of the horribly sexist and unprofessional teaching style of lewis.

and lanzer's bitterness to women was all too clear and hateful.
multiple people have told me he asks out students and one girl dropped his class for discomfort.
couldn't someone have a talk with him and explain to him that this is 2010?

here is my tedious blog.
i spoke up today at this ridiculous student government meeting where they are spending the entire meeting on a defamation attack against a woman of color.
i find it appallingly unintelligent and sad.

i am going to oregon to take an environmental policy class at portland state university.
i can't wait.
i hope the people are more enlightened and professional up there.

thnx again and could you help tell the law team to be careful and stop alienating students with bad behavior????

my experience has been poisoned, but it doesn't have to be that way for the new students next fall.

thank you for keeping the academic level high.  i really appreciate the pace.


Wednesday 28 April 2010

as the classic debate between free speech and hate/speech and defamation goes on, i would like to apologize to anyone who i have offended.

when i spoke today at the ASO meeting i spoke of the "lynching" of sheila d.
i told the LACC student government that to put a woman of color on trial in 2010 is a waste of time.

they are conducting themselves like the salem witch trial or mcarthy era red scare.

those of us with our eye on the future know that transparency in all things will be the norm for the future generation.

i will be videoblogging tonight at laccequalitycoalition tonight.

i think sheila should pursue this as harassment and discrimination, exhaust the (ineffective) administrative remedies and proceed to court.

unfortunately the harassing and discriminatory and defamatory conduct of the ASO will redound to the LACC adnministration and the LACC district.

that a woman of color could have her character impugned by a power bloc of men, bent on wasting school resources on enacting their petty power display and vengeance, is actionable.

that the administration enables this monkey court to conduct its sexist and racist hate campaign, and squander student trust, is but another failure in a long list of failures.

i, mary eng, founder of the LACC Equality Coalition, do not endorse the sexist and racist action of the ASO.

nor to i accept attempts to censor my blog or sanitize language.
my blog is not here to whitewash LACC harassment and discrimination.

that Joseph Tolle, ASO VP for finance, screamed at me under the voting tent today when i told him not to touch me, will be written up tomorrow in cristy passman's office.

after i spoke against the divisiveness on campus twice in the opening forum, he came up to me and wrapped his arm around me.  i looked at his hand on my arm and said, "i don't know who you are.  who are you?"

i proceeded to get his name and email and his expression of confidence.
he came to me during the recess and tried to put his hand on me twice as he explained why sheila should be impeached.

i flinched and puled away and he muttered, "i'm sorry."

then later in the courtyard, i realized, his condescending pattern of unwanted and unsolicited touching must stop.

he put his hand on my shoulder again.
i said "don't touch me.  i don't know who you are.  you shouldn't touch strangers."

he then screamed at me that i touched him and there was a double standard.
this is completely untrue, as i hadn't touched him.
i couldn't believe he would scream at me in public.
about ten people were present.
i can't believe he is a student government representative.

earic peters clarified the heirarchy of the grievance procedure, and let me know that cristy passman is the appropriate place to discuss my assertion that the use of the words in class "show your tits" twice and then "tits and ass" shouted, constitute an unfair hostile atmosphere for women to pursue their education in peace.

he kept repeating himself.
i told him cristy passman said i should go to student government to start a program for equality in education.
he said that is not ASO's function.
that's christy passman's function.
i told him she is ineffective and brushes stuff under the rug.
andrea bari said even a teacher who complained about students saying harassing stuff found her to be very dismissive.
a security officer student told me there is a history teacher on campus who always has to say bad words.
i told him we should do an interview.

i hope to refocus some of these issues on to youtube, which might be a more effective medium.

as for scott clapson who told me i should not use the word "lynch,"
i said to him, yes it is a strong word.  it conveys racism.  it conveys unfairness.

he said he would get a cease and desist letter to make me take them off the blog.
i told him i already have a takedown letter from eric kim (on intellectual property grounds).

he conveyed a bungled version of my broadcast in which i called the classroom style authoritarian and fascistic.
i did not call anyone in particular a fascist.
i also wrote to the teacher more specifically addressing the way he talks down to women when they speak in class.
my new friend gabby, who is heading up the denim day rape awareness film competition, told me she notices this too, and for that reason, stays silent in class.
when i witnessed it early in the semester, i almost arose to the defense of the student who was being put down, but realized i wasn't ready to jeopardize my grade and reputation.
now i can see the larger picture of how this too, has happened to me, and to her over and again.

the funny thing about alleging sexism, is that sometimes sexist people are moreover misanthropist.
so it gets fuzzy sometimes when the hatred gets doled out 60% women/40% to men, etc.

as etymology was sighted by the professor himself, the origin of the word "fasces" from the latin for the sticks of power might be helpful.

as blogs are powerful, technology can be powerful, education can be powerful, i would recommend that the ASO and LACC district counsel worry less about what happens on the blogosphere and more about the PR nightmares and violations of equality in education statutes that occur on their watch.

they shouldn't try to silence me, but get to the root of the problem, and head off these lawsuits which really waste the school budget.

meanwhile they are crucifying sheila for an old school copy machine going haywire, citing wasted paper as fiscal irresponsibility, i wonder . . .

lawsuits, frivolous power displays . . . are . . .

that another grown man would raise his voice at me at LACC, means i am enduring psychological abuse as a result of my attempting to finish up my paralegal classes at LACC.

i am not intimidated easily, but i do see the negative effects of this eating my soul.

i am really happy to have met jay cortez's campaign manager jaden ledkins who shares my enthusiasm for technology and the acceleration of IT power to facilitate learning.
we here, are a part of the digital divide.

we need to make tech a part of the LACC experience!!!!

i asked ASO to get behind bambusering the next ASO meeting which will be another stoning of sheila dharod.

wouldn't it be great to videocast ASO pettiness, divisiveness, etc.?
i am so ashamed.

it should be on the internet how mean and vicious and petty the proceedings are.

plan to upload my quicktime footage later and broadcast audio tonight.

for fun check out this bit of california code:

EDUCATION CODE 
SECTION 234-234.3 

234.  (a) This article shall be known and may be cited as the Safe
Place to Learn Act.
   (b) It is the policy of the State of California to ensure that all
local educational agencies continue to work to reduce
discrimination, harassment, and violence. It is further the policy of
the state to improve pupil safety at schools and the connections
between pupils and supportive adults, schools, and communities.




234.1.  The department, pursuant to subdivision (b) of Section
64001, shall monitor adherence to the requirements of Chapter 5.3
(commencing with Section 4900) of Division 1 of Title 5 of the
California Code of Regulations and Chapter 2 (commencing with Section
200) as part of its regular monitoring and review of local
educational agencies, commonly known as the Categorical Program
Monitoring process. The department shall assess whether local
educational agencies have done all of the following:
   (a) Adopted a policy that prohibits discrimination and harassment
based on the characteristics set forth in Section 422.55 of the Penal
Code and Section 220.
   (b) Adopted a process for receiving and investigating complaints
of discrimination and harassment based on the characteristics set
forth in Section 422.55 of the Penal Code and Section 220.
   (c) Publicized antidiscrimination and antiharassment policies,
including information about the manner in which to file a complaint,
to pupils, parents, employees, agents of the governing board, and the
general public. The information shall be translated pursuant to
Section 48985.
   (d) Posted antidiscrimination and antiharassment policies in all
schools and offices, including staff lounges and pupil government
meeting rooms.
   (e) Maintained documentation of complaints and their resolution
for a minimum of one review cycle.
   (f) Ensured that complainants are protected from retaliation and
that the identity of a complainant alleging discrimination or
harassment remains confidential, as appropriate.
   (g) Identified a responsible local educational agency officer for
ensuring district or office compliance with the requirements of
Chapter 5.3 (commencing with Section 4900) of Division 1 of Title 5
of the California Code of Regulations and Chapter 2 (commencing with
Section 200).



234.1.  The department, pursuant to subdivision (b) of Section
64001, shall monitor adherence to the requirements of Chapter 5.3
(commencing with Section 4900) of Division 1 of Title 5 of the
California Code of Regulations and Chapter 2 (commencing with Section
200) as part of its regular monitoring and review of local
educational agencies, commonly known as the Categorical Program
Monitoring process. The department shall assess whether local
educational agencies have done all of the following:
   (a) Adopted a policy that prohibits discrimination and harassment
based on the characteristics set forth in Section 422.55 of the Penal
Code and Section 220.
   (b) Adopted a process for receiving and investigating complaints
of discrimination and harassment based on the characteristics set
forth in Section 422.55 of the Penal Code and Section 220.
   (c) Publicized antidiscrimination and antiharassment policies,
including information about the manner in which to file a complaint,
to pupils, parents, employees, agents of the governing board, and the
general public. The information shall be translated pursuant to
Section 48985.
   (d) Posted antidiscrimination and antiharassment policies in all
schools and offices, including staff lounges and pupil government
meeting rooms.

ASO
discrimination
harassment
defamation
lawsuit
lynching
a woman of color on the federal dime

PR nightmare

call eric kim and let him know what's coming
write fink, allred, other discrim attys

and note earic peters is uninterested in equality on campus
refers it to christie passman and says ASO does not deal with discrimination against women
they actually dole it out under his watch to sheila d.

note check spelling cristy passman not christy passman
go fix mistakes

LACC
respondeat superior
apologies
ASO meeting quite a laugh.
making footage on quicktime.
mad IT blocks a bambuser.com stream.
its edu-tainmant!

made friends with joseph tolle of finance and IT innovator taylor crockett.
hope to make allies for tech development, disability rights, and fiscal responsibility.

Tuesday 27 April 2010

talking with a friend about the ASO general pettiness.
and that the megan's law tidbit is an election manipulation.
of course.

but still so, i'd rather have fake sympathy than none at all!

christy passman this morning tried to ask if i meant for her to drop the case.
by all means no!
and then scourged me for sending it to sacramento, because now they are after her for an investigation.
of course.
i demurely said, oh its nice to know how the bureaucracy works.
she said she'd prefer if i'd not do that that.

and i joked, well this is not going to happen again is it?

if the school was a hate free zone with a proactive stance against discrimination and pettiness and verbal hostilities and racism, christie passman wouldn't have sacramento breathing down her neck.

i have a vision of every classroom with a placard reading "hate free zone" and numbers and emails for violations of an equal learning atmosphere, and citations to the fed and state code providing for equality in education.
citing the civil rights acts.
and so if teachers said offensive things, it would be against a backdrop of complete information disclosure, a grievance process plain to see, and the laws offended clearly on record.
and then would the students have the guts to stand up for themselves?
or enough literacy to read the placard?

a brilliant law student mentioned that when the teacher hit the student over the head with the student's project proposal, that could constitute assault, and the student could file it.
wow, good point.

and  the general inanity of the student government knows no bounds except they do not like women or women of color, or discussing anything important, but plan to spend all afternoon tomorrow in pettiness, bickering, backbiting, and staging a public crucifixion of sheila for making too many copies when the copier misfired.
they are like a pack of wild dogs, with no concern for anything concrete profound or true.
why i should drag my soul into their pathetic warmaking is not clear.

i told sheila she should report the ASO haters to christie for discrimination based on gender and ethnicity.
the male dominant types have totally taken over the legal association as well, rendering it a bombastic  place for men with big voices and big egos to boom at eachother.
when one coyly asked if i wanted to type minutes, i thought how funny,
here are all these guys looking for a big ego boost shouting a big storm asking me to type it down when they've nothing to say.
ah to be relegated to secretarial role!
i have not returned.
silliness!!!!

how many days to freedom?

email response to gene fernandez who says the abuse sounds scary


writing my blog
writing sacramento

made
report with christie passman (who protected the abusers spring 09)
report with joyce moore
report with earic peters

need to schedule meeting with peters

also crying nonstop bc
that is what psychological abuse is designed to do

intimidate people out of their right to an equal learning atmosphere and make them weak powerless and afraid

i have also lost my appetite and have recurring thoughts of anxiety and pain
and flashbacks

umm---i am trying to stay cool and not drop out of school but 
when professors harass 

women who have already been sexually harassed at work, by strangers, etc or people who have been sexually abused
they trigger flashbacks and reignite the pain

i am so deeply saddened that LACC admin will not do something proactive now to stop the abuse

thanks for your support gene.
i will forward to you an especially disgusting email from the tits and ass professor

i have a huge history of correspondence with lewis who wanted us to do a report on topless dancing and who talks about prostitution in the most demeaning way possible.
he too is such a shame to the school

thank you
mary eng
earic can we meet soon?






From: gene fernandez <janvin1988@gmail.com>
To: mary eng
Sent: Tue, April 27, 2010 11:46:36 AM
Subject: Re: Hi this is about the student trustee election.

Wow, what are you doing about the situation? It sounds scary!

On Tue, Apr 27, 2010 at 7:12 AM, mary eng <maryeng1@yahoo.com> wrote:
> gene thank you.
> this is disturbing.
> as a sexual abuse survivor, i especially suffer when my professors say
> offensive things like "slut" (lanzer in the law department) or bartelt in
> anthropology ("tits and ass").
> it also hurts that they treat women condescendingly and are mean to them
> when they talk.
> and now to think about this????
> thank you for trying to protect us.
> there is/was a registered offender in my building.
> i'm so creeped out.
>
> ________________________________
> From: gene fernandez <janvin1988@gmail.com>
> To: Gene fernandez <janvin1988@gmail.com>
> Sent: Tue, April 27, 2010 1:03:59 AM
> Subject: Hi this is about the student trustee election.
>
> Hi there I know I've talked to a few of you guys on the phone about
> this but could you let me know if a Mr. Stefan Stitch came to your
> club meetings at any time within the last couple of weeks to speak
> about the student trustee position? Please let me know. He is a
> registered sex offender and due to Megans Law he has to inform the
> campus security of his whereabouts on campus. So if you can let me
> know ASAP please do.
>
> You can read more about Megan's law at:
>
http://www.meganslaw.ca.gov/
>
>
>
California's Megan's Law provides the public with certain information
> on the whereabouts of sex offenders so that members of our local
> communities may protect themselves and their children. Megan's Law is
> named after seven-year-old Megan Kanka, a New Jersey girl who was
> raped and killed by a known child molester who had moved across the
> street from the family without their knowledge. In the wake of the
> tragedy, the Kankas sought to have local communities warned about sex
> offenders in the area. All states now have a form of Megan's Law.
>
>
>
> --
> Thank you very much
>
>
> Let me know when we exchange words what I can do to be better because
> if you do not then I have failed you and you have have failed your
> honesty. -Gene Fernandez
>